Don't Say My Name (Tam & Truth)

[Tammika]

The rest of his day was not as crappy. He got his twenty minute nap, actually he got a thirty minute nap and missed the first ten of his next class, thankfully, it was canceled and he went back to his usual nook at the library and fell back asleep, only for his friend Crystal to wake him up and drag him to lunch.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Come on! It will be fun. You have yet to go to a single party this year and you have sexy Crystal here begging you-"

"I am not begging!"

"Okay asking, asking you to come and you say no man? Dude? It's an extra long weekend and a beach party! Crystal in a bikini... Are you gay or something?"

Shin instantly gagged on his sandwich just as the question left Luke's mouth causing everyone but Crystal to stare at him. Luke was patting him on the back and laughing and a couple of others were smiling, but Crystal just looked at Kevin, or his odd reaction. She didn't say a word after that and the subject was dropped. For the moment.

~~~~~~~~~~

Three days a later on Thursday, Kevin was heading back to his car at the end of all his classes for the day. He always parked his car in the student commuting lot as usual. But when he got there to day, someone had spray painted 'fag' in red spray paint all over it.

[TruthSayer]

Jon was having a good week. No cross-dressing students had accosted him at Albertsons, McDonalds, or knocked on his front door attempting to sell Girl Scout cookies, and he'd done a wonderful job of completely ignoring the obnoxious one in his class. He didn't call on him, didn't look at him, and didn't acknowledge the answers he did give even when they were the right ones and just about everyone else was wrong. No one had accosted his office with bullshit sob stories about why they didn't have their homework, why they flunked the test on Wednesday, and why they wouldn't be able to make the test next Friday.

Wonderful week, and today he was leaving an hour early to pick up the last present for Sarah's birthday party this Saturday. He left his work at work for once, taking his normal path through the student's parking lot to the 308 bus' bench on the other side empty handed, squinting in the harsh midday sun and wishing he'd remembered his sun glasses that morning. He glanced around, checking for cars, for students he wanted to avoid that might be stupid enough to want a word with him, and caught sight of Kevin Jacobs standing beside his car. He scowled and meant to walk right past him, but stopped in his tracks at what was written on the side of it.

Instant anger assailed him that mixed with an amazing dose of pity; it was Idaho all over again, except now it was happening to a student that did not deserve it, no matter how obnoxious or strange he might be, and that was something Jon couldn't ignore.

Jon kicked the concrete. He shifted from foot to foot and put his hands in his pockets only to take them out and cross them over his chest. He took a step forward, then decided that that probably wasn't close enough to figure out how Kevin was doing, and so took just enough to put him within a parking space of Kevin's back.

"Nice paint job," he said, and then winced, sure that probably wasn't the right thing to say.

[Tammika]

Kevin jerked around to look at the source of the voice. Pure hate anger and hurt in his eyes. He was ready to kill someone, but just let his shoulders sag and laughed. A cynical little chuckle his voice low and lacking the normal up beat tone when being sarcastic. "Thanks. I did it myself. I thought it would be a cool way to announce to the world that I swing both ways, by spray painting insults on my own car. I'm a genius. A fucking genius." He didn't cry, bu he sure as hell wanted to cry or punch some one or just crawl in a hole and die. his mind flashed back to his senior year when got his ass beat by some jock from school he didn't even know. "Here we go again." he whispered and pulled out his cell phone to call the campus police.

[TruthSayer]

It was surprising to hear Kevin was bi; Jon had thought him to be out-and-out gay, and that everyone would have known it by now, too. The fact that Jon didn't until he saw Kevin a skirt and bra didn't matter; Jon viewed every one of his students as 100% asexual until they put in his face by making out in the halls.

"I would have gone for a nice subtle neon pink, but then that's just me," Jon muttered, and took a small step closer, eyes tracing the letters as though he could see them as they formed. Stupid childish crap that did nothing but hurt people. What happened to the good old days when you punched someone in the face when you had a problem with them? And fixing that was going to be expensive.

"I have a friend that does body work and paint cheap if you're interested," he said, and then bit his tongue. Remember the Cardinal Rules, Jonny, he thought, and took a step back. Don't be nice to the kiddies and they won't stab you in the back.

But the least he could do was wait until security got there.

[Tammika]

The police had to come take pictures and fill out a report, all the crap he didn't want to think about, but it was the small crowd that appeared first, along with Shin, that was slowly making him lose it. Shin was pissed walking up just after the professor made his offer. "Um, yeah, that's... great, thanks." Shin put an arm around his shoulder and it nearly made him cry right then. He chewed his bottom lip.

"I'd offer you a ride man but Reggie has my car now. Hey, hey man, look at me, you okay?" Shin gripped his face in his hands forcing Kevin to look him in the eye.

"No Shin, I'm fabulous.. hell no I'm not okay but I'm gonna have to be." The idea of getting his ass beat again by a bunch of gay bashers was not a very appealing thought and Shin knew all about it. "I'm gonna try and wash what I can and just go home, I need my car for work anyway."

"You want me to come with you? Three day weekend. I can crash at your place."

"No! Uh no I'll be all right, really it's cool Shin."

"Okay, okay, just chill I'm right here for now okay?"

"Yeah, thanks. I'm sorry this is just... Damn!" He sat down on the curb. Shin squatted behind him, hands rubbing Kevin's shoulders.

"Just relax man. Don't worry okay that shit ain't happening again. Not as long as I got your back man. You hear me? I'll go all asian on somebody's ass."

"Shin you don't even know karate."

"They don't know that."

"You're so stupid."

"You're laughing."

"Yeah, I know."

Kevin managed to keep it together when the security and campus police showed up. It actually went fast and as soon as they were gone most of the crowd left.

"You sure you don't want me to crash at your place?"

Kevin thought about it, but figured it would be too risky with Shin at his house. "No, that's okay. I'll be fine."

[TruthSayer]

Jon was glad when Shin showed up. He stood back and said nothing, keeping his distance effectively by leaning against the opposite side of the car next to Kevin's. He did listen, though, and didn't like what he heard about 'this shit happening again'. Why the hell couldn't people mind their own goddamn business? Especially when it came to picking on people who hadn't done anything to deserve it.

When the police came, Jon took that as his cue to leave. It wasn't like he could offer clues as to who it was, and he wasn't comfortable with even this small crowd of students seeing him hanging around another student's car, especially when he recognized most of them. And it wasn't like he was going to offer Kevin a ride, or the option to stay at his place this weekend, because there was nothing wrong with Kevin's... house/apartment/cardboard box under the I-60 bridge or wherever it was he lived, and Jon did not open his home to students.

"You should let him stay at your place," Jon said as he turned to walk away. He'd give Kevin the number to the body shop tomorrow before class, and when the bell rang, he'd go back to happily pretending that he didn't exist.

[Tammika]

"See? See? Listen to the man." Shin shook Kevin's shoulders extra hard, making him pull away.

"No, I'll be fine, I'll just roll the windows down and it will just say 'ag' anyway." Shin ignored him and threw his bag in the back of the car anyway. "You're stuck with me, man. I hope you have food."

"Shin.." He ran his hands through his hair and pulled the band out without thinking, leaving all of his hair hanging over one shoulder. "You know you're fucking impossible. He automatically slid it on his wrist and got in the driver seat.

As he passed the professor walking back to his car he was tempted to flip him off again, but instead, he just glanced at him, shrugged and drove home.

"Dude. You really need to cut the hair."

"Fuck off Shin."

~~~~~~~~~~~

"How come your place is so...clean man?"

"Because i don't like living in shit, like you. Look, sit down I need to fucking tell you something if you're gonna stay here? And just... never mind, wait there I'll just show you."

Two hours later, Karen was at work and Shin was at his house still in shock. He took it well but was even more worried about him. Kevin got three text in the first hour, all from Shin checking on him. It was kinda funny. His best friend was mad, but calmed down pretty fast after asking a million questions.

I'm gonna turn my phone off if you keep texting me DAD!

After that he calmed down and they didn't talk until he called to tell him he was leaving work. It was kinda nice to have Shin over after all.

[TruthSayer]

"I still don't know why we couldn't just barbeque," Jon muttered into his office phone. He listened to Melissa with half an ear, pink highlighter moving over a couple of words in the paragraph he was reading as he prepared his lesson plan for Monday considering he wouldn't be able to get any work done this weekend.

"Because it's not every day our little Sar-bear turns four, Jon," Melissa said, sounding just as patient with him as she did when Sarah asked her a million questions.

Jon gritted his teeth. "I hate it when you call her 'Sar-bear'."

"No more than I hate it when you call her 'General'," Melissa quipped brightly. "Besides, I'm her mother, and I say we're catering. You have the bouncy castle and the slip-n-slide and the clown?"

"Yes, dear," Jon muttered a bit snidely. "Who's catering, anyway? Pizza Shack?"

"And feed my child that crap? Hell no," Melissa scoffed. "O'Charlie's."

Jon choked on his spit.

[Tammika]

"Um.. catering..job? What? but I.."

"You'll be fine Karen you just serve food like you always do. It's actually even easier since you just stay by the table and keep the trays full."

It seemed easy but Kevin was unfamiliar with the address and didn't want to be near school. "How far do we have to go?"

"It's not too far. Relax honey, you will do fine, just watch Carla and you will be fine, okay? Now here, change into this tee shirt and help load the truck. If you help load it will be faster clean up because you know where it all goes."


Two hours later Karen was setting up tray at a child birthday party. So far all was fine. It was the opposite direction so that was good, and work was easy once the trays were set up. Kevin had his hair up today since he would be outside, but the layered part in the front he had actually curled a little and let hang out on one side. Tight jeans and his work tee shirt knotted at the waist like all the other waitresses, he was busy setting up and had yet to see the family since they were early of course.

Jimmy, one of the cooks, there mostly for the heavy lifting, since it was all prepared was helping Kevin unload the drinks."hey that's pretty heavy! Let me get that. Jen will kill me if one of you guys break your back or something or God forbid a nail." he rolled his eyes and stepped in close to take the cases from Kevin, making sure to brush against his arms more than needed."

Kevin just laughed since Jimmy flirted with all the girls. "Hey, that actually hurt you know, to have a nail rip off, so shut up."

"You want this back?"

"No no. You go ahead."

[TruthSayer]

Jon was trying very hard to figure out how to not attend his own daughter's birthday party when he saw the O'Charlie's van pull up outside and Kevin step out of it like he was queen of the friggin' world. Well, perhaps not, but 'queen' wasn't that far from the truth.

Sarah stood in front of her bathroom mirror, turning this way and that to see every angle of the third bathing suit she put on to ensure this one was really what she wanted to wear. Pink polka-dots on a yellow background, a little tutu around the waist, and curly hair in pigtails, she forgot all about worrying over her outfit when the doorbell rang, and Jon had no choice but to be sociable. Guests arrived one after the other until the large backyard was milling with adults enjoying wine coolers and beer and screaming children that harassed the clown, made good use of the slip-n-slide, and bounced so high in the bouncy castle that several mothers looked as though they were questioning the safety of it. They screamed for cake, for ice cream, for hamburgers and hotdogs and french fries, and cried when balloon animals popped or they were shot in the face by water guns.

Through the window, it looked like every one was having a great time.

It also looked like Melissa and Jack and his wife were beginning to wonder where he was.

He took a deep breath, knowing beyond a doubt that there were too many people here as witnesses to be accused of anything, and headed out the back door, swinging Sarah up into his arms when she ran to him, giggling and soaking wet.

"Look, Daddy! The pretty lady is here!" she said, face bright red with exertion and excitement as she pointed at Kevin.

Jon tried very hard to look excited, but couldn't quite manage it when he looked at Kevin.

[Tammika]

Kevin was in the middle of stomping on Jimmy's foot for some slick comment and looked up at the the familiar voice. he froze when he saw the little girl... Sarah? And her dad. Oh. Fuck. Jimmy elbowed him. "You know the birthday girl?"

"No, yeah, kinda of," but Kevin was looking at Jon. "They came in the restaurant a week or so ago, I remember her since ...a drink was spilled." Kevin took a deep breath and waved at Sarah, giving her a big smile.

"Okay, so you know them, but why is he looking at you like that? It's kinda creepy. He looks pissed."

Kevin grinned. "I don't know. I think he's kinda hot." The words fell out of his mouth before he could think clearly about what he was saying, but it was too late, Carla and Jimmy both laughed and teased Kevin about it the whole day

[TruthSayer]

Sarah waved happily at Kevin, tugging insistently on Jon's sleeve. "I wanna say hi!"

"So go say hi," Jon said, moving to set her down, but little fists balled in his shirt.

"Not by myself, Daddy!"

Jon really wanted to remind her that she was four now, and a big girl who should be able to say introduce herself without him tagging along, but big brown eyes blinked at him with an insistence that innocence to his dislike of Kevin. He sighed and walked over to the food line, shifting Sarah higher onto his hip as he glanced over the food laid out for people to enjoy. Hotdogs, hamburgers, steaks, and a couple of platters of vegetarian eggplant Parmesan that actually looked pretty good.

"Hi!" Sarah beamed at Kevin when they were across from him. "It's my birthday!"

[Tammika]

Jimmy elbowed Kevin forward a little and Carla was biting the inside of her cheeks, but she didn't laugh out loud at the way Kevin was still blushing. They both had teased him relentlessly when they saw him coming over.

"Why hello again precious! Happy birthday, Sarah! If I had known it was you I would have brought you a present." Kevin was so nervous because he knew how flush his face was but he just talked sweet with Sarah for a few minutes and then Jimmy and Carla moved around behind him with the drinks and food. Jimmy brushed close behind Kevin a few times but then stopped behind him putting both hands on his arms and rubbed them up and down. Kevin felt a little weird at the sudden touch, but he didn't want to be rude and jerk away. This was just normal Jimmy flirting right?

"Hey social butterfly, sorry to break up the reunion but we are working, Karen."

"Oh right. I gotta get to work Sarah. I hope I see you at the restaurant again."

[TruthSayer]

Jon wasn't entirely sure why Kevin not acknowledging him bugged him so much, but decided to blame it on the blatant rudeness of the situation. It didn't matter that Jon hadn't done a thing to acknowledge Kevin, either.

Sarah chatted with Kevin as though she known him all her life, happy to have an audience that talked with her instead of down to her. That, and Kevin wished her a happy birthday, which made her happy enough to run off and get Kevin a flower hat balloon, and gave Jon a chance to offer a curt nod when Kevin was pulled away to work and move to the extreme corner of the yard; both his and Melissa's back yards put together, no fence to separate them, and it still didn't feel far enough away from Kevin and the way the cook flirted with him. Didn't that guy know Kevin was a male? Disgusting, really, and if the man didn't know Kevin was male, Kevin had the duty to tell him.

"You want to tell my why you're glaring at cutey over there?"

Jon shorted, shooting Jack a look as he took the beer the man handed him. "I am not staring, that is not cute, and one more comment and I'm telling your wife."

Jack grinned, unafraid. "Tell her. Jenny knows I like to look. Doesn't stop me from coming home to supper, though."

"That's twisted," Jon muttered, and took a pull from his beer.

Jack afforded him with a look. "You could use someone to cook you supper, too, you know," he said, gesturing toward Jon with his drink to punctuate his point. "Fix you a nice steak."

"I don't eat meat," Jon said offhandedly.

Jack grinned around the neck of his bottle. "Well, not animal meat. But I'm sure that if some hot young dude just happened to come prancing into the backyard naked- FUCK THAT'S COLD!"

Jon shook his upended beer bottle over Jack's head to make sure that every drop inside of it fell onto his friend's head, and walked inside.

[Tammika]

"He likes you." Carla crept up behind Kevin and whispered in his ear.

"Carla!" Kevin almost dropped a bag of ice on his foot but hopped back out of the way. Carla laughed hysterically.

"That was priceless."

"It would have been for you if I had broke my toe. And what are you talking about anyway?"

"Jimmy. He is all over you!" Carla grinned as Kevin pulled her to the side near the house but still in the back yard by the gate.

"I thought that's how he was with everyone? He's just a big flirt." Kevin looked a little worried and Carla still smiled.

"Girl he only flirts that much with you. He wants some Carebear bad." Kevin covered Carla's mouth as Jimmy came close to them, smirk on his face.

"Ladies. Skipping out on all the work again?" He smiled, but winked at Kevin. Him and Carla exchanged looks and Kevin picked up the bag of ice.

"Nope! Just getting more ice." He scooted past him to go put it on the drinks in the tubs. Missing Carla's elbow by an inch.

Jimmy was cute. Tall, blonde, built and the curls were cute, though Jimmy didn't like them too much. Kevin realized he had said something to that effect a long time ago and he let his hair grow out some instead of... Oh fuck no. The guy was hot but Kevin had his eye on a certain grumpy, foul tempered, professor prick....why, he still wasn't sure, but even though he thought the man was straight he couldn't shake his secret obsession with him.

He decided to back off with the flirting with Jimmy and spent the rest of the party keeping distance between them.

[TruthSayer]

Monday morning and another class with Kevin in it. Jon tapped the end of his pencil on the corner of his podium absently, eyes flicking over the empty desks before him that would be filled with students in less than ten minutes. He could hear them in the corridor, joking by the door, refusing to enter until the exact moment the bell rang because they'd seen he was already in the classroom and who in their right mind wanted to be around him more than they had to?

The thought did not sadden him.

Jon stood from his stool and whirled around, putting his back to the neat rows of empty lab tables as he crossed his arms over his chest, refusing to allow his eyes to come to a rest one more time on Kevin's desk, refusing to let his mind think one more time on whether or not the cook at the birthday party had known whether or not Kevin was a male, and whether or not he cared; refused to think about whether or not the police had any leads on who had vandalized Kevin's car, and if Shin had really stayed over at Kevin's place, and if Kevin had called Jon's contact to get his car detailed yet.

Kevin was not his concern, in a skirt, or in jeans; with his hair up, or down; with a new paint job on his car or with the word Fag still written plain and bold on the side of it. Jon's concern was the day's curriculum and how many students had actually done their homework to prepare for it.

[Tammika]

"Seriously?! That is awesome, so you'll be gone next week then, both of you? Damn it's gonna be so quiet without you two here." Kevin came in behind James, yawning but not looking like death warmed over this time. He got enough sleep this weekend despite the shock of attending the birthday party. When he saw Shin sitting there looking tight he asked what was up but didn't get a clear answer.

"Serious shit, I'll tell you later and we may need to ditch our next class."

"What the fuck, ditch class? Are you smoking shit Shin, the Shin does not-" He saw the look on his face and just stopped. "Okay after class. Cool. oh by the way thanks for helping me with the car thing. Mine should be ready Wednesday."

"No problem."

Class started and he had to wait until afterwards to learn what was up.

[TruthSayer]

"But sir, I'm still having difficulties understanding the difference between extensor and flexor," Guy McDaniels called from the back of the class, hand raised high over his head as a look of confusion passed over his face.

Jon took a moment to remind himself that it was not polite to call a student stupid in front of the entire class despite the fact that many of them turned in their seats to offer him dirty looks; they had been going over this material more extensively than Jon normally spent on a particular subject, as the muscles tended to be the subject most students had difficulty with. The difference between extensor and flexor, however, was as base a concept as tying ones shoes.

"The muscles, or the concept?" Jon asked.

"The concept. I can study the muscles later," Guy answered.

Jon pursed his lips and pushed away from his podium, walking slowly to the back of the class to stand behind Guy. He bent his arm, said casually, "Flexor," then smacked Guy on the back of the head, mussing his already messy hair further, "Extensor. I flex my arm to prepare to smack you on the back of the head, then extend it to carry out the action. Understand now, Guy?"

Guy's mouth worked soundlessly as he stared with shock at Jon, sitting motionless even after Jon went back to the front of the class and continued on to the next slide.

[Tammika]

Kevin tried his best to hold in his laugh, but with every one around him snickering and snorting, it was pointless. The look on Guy 's face when he turn behind him to see was hilarious. He kept giggling on occasion for the rest of the class earning a pencil tossed at him from Guy.

After class it was different, Shin grabbed him by the arm and had him out so fast he left both his text book and his notebook. His notebook full of all his classwork and some work he did extra to make up for the time he would be gone with the swim team.

When they arrived at Shins dorm room Kevin was beyond curious, but it was all clear when Shin showed him a defunct webpage he had hacked and frozen. Kevin was beyond mad at the hate towards the professor that he read, but a tiny part of him was in shock to think he might be... gay??

"Is... is there any truth to this?" Kevin asked hesitantly.

"Yes. It's all true except for the insults of course, the problem is, as much as the guy is an ass, he shouldn't lose his job because of this shit. There's more. This was done by someone on campus. The same asshole that tagged your car, Crystal's brother David."

"Shit!"

Shin showed him all the evidence about other stuff the guy had done. Kevin thought it was because of the car incident but people he thought were friends had been slowly avoiding him. There was all sorts of crap, false crap about him and a few other gay students on this site and the new page that was about to be published had the altered info on the professor.

"Where is he now?"

"David? Probably in the chemistry lab."

"Let's go have a chat with him."

"I was hoping you'd say that." Shin grinned.

[TruthSayer]

Dean Veckors was a really old man. His hair was a wispy white that no longer grew on the top of his head but matched his caterpillar brows in wild thickness perfectly. Blue eyes nearly as pale as his hair were just as sharp today as they had been twenty years ago when he first took the position of Dean of Administrations, though they remained hidden much of the time behind thick glasses that sat atop a bulbous pock-marked nose. He was stick-thin, his voice as gravelly as if he had been smoking two packs a day from the moment he popped out of the womb though Jon had never known him to light up, and was amazingly unremarkable except for his height, which even at the age of seventy-eight managed to tower well over six feet.

Jon had learned not to cross him long ago.

So it was with trepidation when he looked up from his computer in his office to see the man standing in his doorway, favoring him with a steady glare. "You struck a student," was all he said, yet managed to get Jack to his feet so quickly Jon wondered if he'd been bit on the ass by an ant.

"I've just remembered I have something to do," Jack muttered in a quick rush, skirted around Dean Veckors as though the man had leprosy, and shut the door behind himself with a quick snick as soon as he was in the hall.

"You're not supposed to strike a student, Jon," Veckors rumbled, moving to take the seat in front of Jon's desk; muscles creaked and joints popped as he lowered himself into it, long knobby fingers tapping quietly on the arms of the chair.

"It was a demonstration," Jon said, eyes flicking back to his computer screen and the grades scrolling across it.

Veckors' blue eyes narrowed. A muscle in his forehead twitched, and he shifted slightly in his seat. Jon glanced at him, then glanced away.

"What did it feel like?"

Jon glanced back at him. "Amazingly fulfilling."

Veckors slapped his knee. "Damn, I've missed that feeling!" he said, a manic-like grin turning the deep lines in his face into canyons. "In my day there was such a thing as corporal punishment! Now, there's graffiti in the halls, tattoos and piercings, and saggy pants!"

Jon snorted. "I understand the dislike of saggy pants, but I'm not one for corporal punishment."

"Speaking of which," Veckors said, the manic grin turning into a proud smile, "How's the General?"

"Wondering why her great-grandfather wasn't at her birthday party," Jon muttered, favoring Veckors with a raised brow, the corner of his mouth twitching as a blush colored the old man's cheeks.

Veckors blustered for a moment, muttering incoherent excuses for another before Jon laughed and relaxed back in his chair, running a hand through his hair. "Was she pretty?"

Veckors actually growled, waggling his bushy eyebrows to punctuate his point. "Woman used to be a cabaret dancer. Legs that went from floor to ceiling, and an ass that would not quit! I think I've found my sixth wife."

Jon snorted and turned back to updating the grades in his computer.